After the horrors of neglected children and Industrial Schools, today’s offering is a quick dose of more characters from Queensland newspapers from the 1840s to 1860s.
Defendant Promises to Leave Town
CENTRAL POLICE COURT. SATURDAY, DECEMBER 31. BEFORE the Police Magistrate: DRUNKENNESS.–James Keane, an old man, who described himself as an attorney, was discharged on his promising to leave the town.
Brisbane Courier (Qld. : 1864 – 1933), Monday 2 January 1865, page 2
Straying pigs, Fireball and Crumpie
POLICE COURT. FRIDAY,-Before W. A. Brown, Esq., P.M., and his Worship the Mayor, (J. Petrie, Esq.)
John Phillip Jost was charged with having suffered four pigs, his property, to stray in Adelaide-street. His defence was, that the animals were as docile as lambs, and that he had never known them to stray further than Dr. Bell’s residence. He only purchased them some short time ago.
Timothy O’Duffy (alias Fireball,) of Kangaroo Point, was also charged by the chief constable with having used obscene and disgusting language on the 1st inst. Fined 5s. with 4s. 6d. costs; in default, the usual alternative in the stone jar.
The next on the list was a gentleman named William Johnston, alias Crumpie, a recent arrival in our city, who was charged by the chief constable with having committed a desecration of the sabbath on the 1st inst. It appeared that the defendant, whose habits are rather of an industrious nature, was found astride the top of a chimney, busily employed in repairing same. On being asked by the officer, if he was aware of the nature of the offence ho was committing, he replied “Pooh man, this is nothing to what I have done. I have helped to build trenches on Christmas Day and shoot and out thousands in the Crimea, but, man, if you do not like my working, I shall go read my history!” Case dismissed.
The Moreton Bay Courier, Saturday 07 January 1860.
Paddy the Horse and McGouzlem’s Fool
IPSWICH: The summary jurisdiction cases were six, viz., Patrick Fahey, better known as “Paddy the Horse,” was brought up on the charge of Mr. Henry Foley, his master, for absconding ; having engaged for six months as cook, and to make himself generally useful, (query, useless), he took the “vagaries,” and at the end of five days demanded his wages, which, on being refused, he became obstreperous, and-bolted.
Next appeared, for blasphemous language in the streets and also drunkenness, a defendant named Thomas Milner, better known as M’Gouzlem’s Fool, a regular Victor Hugo’s “Quasimodo” in ugliness, whose entree created much mirth. He was indeed as ugly as sin, with an obliquity of mug truly remarkable, and lips that would rival any Hottentot Venus, beard of at least a week’s growth, manured by a portion of some puddle which his phiz often appears to fondle, and hair of “mud coloured grey,” standing out like quills upon the fretful porcupine. Fancy all this, and you have my “Caliban.”
The subject matter in dispute will be seen by the following colloquy between Bench and defendant:
Bench – Were you drunk?
Defendant-Oh! yes.
Bench-How much did you drink? Defendant (grinning most ominously) Until I got drunk.
Bench-Had you no water to wash your face? Defendant (another grin) I forgot the water while I drank the rum.
During this short confab the cachinnatory muscles of the auditors were exercised to an unusual degree; even the stern front of Justice was compelled to relax, which was perhaps so much in favour of M’Gouzlem’s Fool, that he was only admonished as to the present working of the Vagrant Act and fined five bob.
Moreton Bay Courier, Monday 10 December 1849.
Picture credits: Kardsunlimited.com, Pinterest.com
Moreton Bay and More 