Irish sailor John McConnell had a very big night ashore in Brisbane in August 1875. His Brisbane Gaol photo has him dishevelled, sporting a bristling moustache and an unkempt, towering coiffure. It’s unlikely that anyone was game to come near him with a comb, given the circumstances of his arrival.
The contemporaneous report is priceless, and here it is in full:
WATER POLICE COURT.
(Before Messrs. Day and E. Webb. JJ.P.)
DISORDERLY CONDUCT AND ASSAULT — John McConnell, a seaman, belonging to the Harmodius, although he got leave to go ashore, can hardly be called a ‘liberty’ man, seeing that he lost that palladium which has always been the birthright of every British subject — at any rate, since Magna Charta in that he has been sent to gaol for over two months.
Jack was so very much ashore, and committed so many and such various assaults, that the police hardly knew which case to take first. The first and the most harmless one gone into, after some hesitation, however, was an assault on the lock-up keeper, whom he struck on the face on his attempting to go through the indelicate process of search. For this Jack received a reward of 40s., or seven days in what is known to seafarers as ‘chokee.’
He was then called upon to explain a particularly unprovoked assault on a fellow prisoner, while in the cells. Donald Cameron, the victim of prisoner’s brutality, presented a very woebegone appearance, and the punishment he received, vicariously, was quite out of proportion to the charge which he was locked up — a slight attack of ebriosity. Donald was much cut and bruised about the head and face and would have met with every sympathy from the audience in court had it not been for the very naïve way in which he gave his evidence, with the result that where tears should have flowed from the audience risibility only was excited. With some confusion of ideas, he described the accused as ‘attacking him like a furious lion with a boot.’ Witness went on to say, ‘In fact he knocked me very poorly.’ This made the prisoner in the dock laugh, which provoked the witness to exclaim, ‘None of your laughter,’ to the additional amusement of the accused and the spectators — who, like all police court frequenters, are ever ready with a guffaw, in or out of season. It was no wonder that Cameron begged, for mercy’s sake, to be removed to quieter quarters.
This witness was fully confirmed by the lock-up keeper, who described the pugnacious seaman as not being very drunk but ‘in good fighting order.’ Thomas Landergan who was the next victim, gave evidence of having received prisoner’s unsolicited attentions. He bore under his eye what a pugilist would gleefully designate ‘a very pretty mouse.’ His description of the act of receiving a black eye was remarkable for originality. He said he was lying asleep in his bunk when ‘he found something come in his face (prisoner’s fist), and woke up with his face this way,’ pointing to his sombre eye. He said the ‘ trouble’ arose from his asking prisoner to go on board with his companions — witness and two coloured seamen. Prisoner declined to be seen in the company of such double-dashed _______s.
Prisoner’s bill of costs for his evening’s amusement was as follows— For being drunk and disorderly; 10s , or twenty-four hours; for assaulting the police, 20s., or seven days; for assaulting Cameron, one month, with hard labour; for assaulting Landergan, also one month’s hard labour.
Moreton Bay and More 